. . . . except when to do so would injure them or others. . . . ALCOHOLICS ANONYMOUS , p. 59
Step Nine restores in me a feeling of belonging, not only to the human race but also to the everyday world. First, the Step makes me leave the safety of A.A., so that I may deal with non-A.A. people “out there,” on their terms. It is a frightening but necessary action if I am to get back into life. Second, Step Nine allows me to remove threats to my sobriety by healing past relationships. Step Nine points the way to a more serene sobriety by letting me clear away past wreckage, lest it bring me down.
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Requiring good judgment, prudent decision-making, humility and courage which is certainly a giant step away from the impulsive and irrational way that I formerly encountered many of the people who relied on me and which speaks eloquently of the grace and power this program of recovery I put myself before the world that I live in expecting full well to be received on an equal basis with other good people of this society.
I was prepared by the wise people who have gone before me and many who were presently with me that this was the usual outcome but I was also prepared to accept any response that came my way without rancor or anger.
One of the most persuasive and lasting ways of making amends in my opinion is living amends and that is what I have done most often and most consistently. After all I was making a living mess before.
This has been extremely good for my own feeling of self-esteem and self worth and I’m sure has had a positive influence on many people.
I’m Harry, a living demonstration of sobriety in a formally helpless and babbling drunk.
thanks harry i am try daily to make a living amends
Living amends were recommended to me when I cried to my sponsor: Oh what about this? OH what about THAT? She would accept no excuse for my self pity and my distaste for the Steps. I was not at Step 9 and she said I should live my amends in the mean time. That lead to my working a mini Step 10 at night and saying I am sorry when I know I had committed a wrong. I began to feel like Step 9 could wait until I got to Step 9 – that I would know more by then and would be able to do the next right thing when the time came THEN – I lived better in the moment and it gave me hope for the fear I felt that I would never be able to do Step 9 well enough to be sober. Today is good enough and the Steps are in order for a reason.
It works if ya work it!
paige – recovering alcoholic