Through many painful experiences, we think we have arrived at what that policy ought to be. It is the opposite in many ways of usual promotional practice. We found that we had to rely upon the principle of attraction rather than promotion. TWELVE STEPS AND TWELVE TRADITIONS, pp. 180-81
While I was drinking I reacted with anger, self-pity and defiance against anyone who wanted to change me. All I wanted then was to be accepted by another human simply as I was and, curiously, that is what I found in A.A. I became the custodian of this concept of attraction, which is the principle of our Fellowship’s public relations. It is by attraction that I can best reach the alcoholic who still suffers. I thank God for having given me the attraction of a well-planned and established program of Steps and Traditions. Through humility and the support of my fellow sober members, I have been able to practice the A.A. way of life through attraction, not promotion.
{ 7 comments… read them below or add one }
AA implies that it is the only program that works, this is self promotion.
AA implies that if you leave the only choices are jails, institutions, and death. This is fear monering.
Is it fair to over generalize a one size fits all cure for all of society?
AA implies that only those in “recovery” can achieve serenity, others are not truly sober, they are dry drunks.
AA says or implies none of the above. Actually if you read the book AA says the opposite. It simply states it’s worked for us. You may want to read the Big Book and the 12 and 12 before making these kind of coments. I beleive it’s also referred to in the book as contempt prior to investigation. I think you may be getting messages crossed from some people in AA and what AA actually says.
I am not a joiner. I am suspicious of groups and institutions because I have a fear of losing my individuality, and because of my belief (true or not) that I am a “free thinker.” I don’t worship a deity. I don’t believe there is an omnipotent, omnipresent, omniscient superior being overseeing our lives. Once I realized I could not quit drinking on my own and accepted the help of others in AA I still did not go to AA meetings on a regular basis, study the steps, or have a sponsor. I didn’t want to “join.” I didn’t want my head shrunk. After 5 years I relapsed. I came back with a new-found respect for my alcoholism and fear that I would continue to drink excessively (and the destruction that goes along with it) if I did not begin to participate. What I have found has surprised me and started me in a direction of personal growth, reassessment of my beliefs, and a growing (but reluctant) understanding that I need others in order to lead a fulfilling life. I have found that it is an individual practice. Others in AA are there to lend a helping hand when I need it – and I have learned to except that hand. And, in the process, I have learned to begin living a good life. My hope is that this will entice others to look into AA if they are having problems with their drinking. But I will not preach to them to join – I know what they are thinking.
fwwid,
AA is its membership, no one reads the book. These things the members told me.
I joined AA and accepted all they said. My brain was damaged so I did not have to think about what I was doing. At over 13 years of sobriety I woke up to the fact that I had been a cult member. I have hurt those that I sponsored by sharing my experiences and used the whole thing as a social business network (thanks for the 100k a year job). My wife was alienated while the women of AA offered me their bodies. Now I see the double edged sword of the programming. The benefit and price are about equal. I fear for my friends that go to meetings but don’t “get it”. Their minds become full of nonsense that the members and speakers say. Most of them die from a sort of self fulfilling prophecy as true believer states. Today I drink in moderation. I used the many AA deprogramming sites on the internet to revoke the doctrine, created a plan for responsible drinking and stuck to it. Last night I celebrated 3 years of moderate drinking without damage to myself. I come to this site because alcohol is best enjoyed by those with a spiritual constitution like the one I got in AA. Anyway, don’t do what I do, this is just my experience.
Thanks for a great site!
This can help
http://luvdrunk.org/
I haven’t ever run across a claim that we have a “one size fits all cure for all of society”! Nor have I read that we have cornered the market on serenity!
We have found a solution like mllions of others before us to recover from alcoholism. I, for one , am very grateful for Alcholics Annonymous.
For every “member” of AA there is a unique story, good and bad. People have good experiences and bad experiences in AA. But EVERYBODY gets out of AA what they put into it. It is an individual program. Hopefully, regardless of the path, it leads to one place: peace and serenity within oneself.